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Thankful for what we do have....

CATEGORY: | Wednesday, January 31, 2007

In light of what we have been thru this past week I have to say...I am very thankful for what I do have. We buried Churchie in the yard he loved so much and this weekend we will make a cement slab for the top with info about him. It is soooooo weird thinking of him out there. I know his energy and soul have left his body but it is hard for me to seperate it. In honor of Churchie I am going to try new things, try and have more order and more joy in my daily life.
I will be brave and strong just like he was and try and push myself to be the best me I can be.
Thanks to EVERYONE that sent me well wishes. It was amazing and has made us feel good.
We knew this would be tough but really had no idea. Putting an animal to sleep is just awful because even though you know it is the best thing for them it doesn't feel right. It is nice to know people care and I have learned that I really, really appreciate my blog and the blogging community. Even my friends that hate leaving comments did and a lot of others sent us emails.
I guess what it boils down to is we are here on this earth for a short time so we should really try to appreciate what we have... and we have a lot. xoxo

Church our friend is gone....

CATEGORY: | Monday, January 29, 2007

We adopted Churchie in 1990 he was 7 months old and abandoned. He actually belonged to this couple that were housemates of a friend's boyfriend. They asked him to watch their cats while they moved and they never came back for them. So he asked Jason if he wanted to adopt him and Jason instantly fell in love with him. He was tough, ornery and he wanted to play and was not shy at all about letting Jason know. He moved in with Jason and was not happy so Jason brought him over to my place and he instantly loved it. My roomie Karen had a cat too and I think he liked her. Her name was Satori and she was part Siamese and boy was she the boss. Churchie liked how strong she was and started teasing her right away. He used to love to plop down right in front of Karen & Satori's room and block the entire doorway making Satori very irritated. He also hid her cat toys and in general just liked to bug her. Then we moved to where we are now and he immediately established himself as king of the hood. He got into soooo many fights back then. We considered making him an indoor cat but he was not going to have anything to do with that. So after a few days of Churchie meowing and trying to wreck our home we gave in and he was very, very grateful. He was soooo strong, independant and handsome....Boy was he handsome!!!! His fur was sooo thick and shiny and bluish gray and in his hay day he weighed 2o pounds...all muscle. He loved to chase pinecones on the lawn and loved his cat nip toys. He turned me into a cat person and there will never, ever be a sweeter more loving cat in the whole entire world. When we got Gucci he was so patient and only got him with his claws 2 times. Once Gucci bit his tail when it was hanging down from a chair. Church jumped in the air turned and when he landed he swiped Gucc with his claws...just once. When we had Memphis he was not at all thrilled but in time grew to love her. I can't begin to imaine our life without him and today has been a very, very,very sad day. Jason is gone right now at the vet and we stayed home all day today and just hung out with him. I know that we were all very lucky to have him in our lives and if will take a long time to adjust but he was 17 years old and still fighting... he just didn't have it in him anymore and it was so awful to see him suffering. I know he will always watch over us and we will feel him in our lives forever. We love you Churchie Lurchie and it hurts so very much now that you are gone. xoxoxo

It has been decided......

CATEGORY: | Sunday, January 28, 2007

So...the vet called us back today with not so good news about Churchie. He may have cancer, Lukemia not the feline kind to be exact or he may just be getting too old(he is 17 years old) His organs are all fine, his blood work was fine and oddly enough his insulin levels are fine. He has lost sooooooooo much weight and he is losing muscle so quickly. He is having trouble with his back legs, is doing really weird things, (we think because he is in pain) does not like being petted much and we have decided it is time. So sometime this week will be his last day with us and I can not stop crying. I know he has had a rich and full life but it just kills me to have to do this. We did not decide this lightly if he goes on cancer drugs they may or may not help, they may even hurt him. If he gets his muscle mass back and is fine for awhile the vet said it will happen again. So...we can't let him suffer any longer and it is also very hard to watch. He was always and still is such a strong cat. I am not posting a photo of him because he is so thin it will break your hearts. So this will be a very long and hard week and I am just so bummed out. We will always love you Churchie and you are the best cat in the entire world....xoxo

Churchie Lurchie....

CATEGORY: | Saturday, January 27, 2007

Churchie Lurchie was adopted by us in 1990. He is now 17 years old. He was diagnosed with diabetes 6 years ago but a year ago he started producing insulin again and got a lot better.
Well...within the last month he has been dropping weight and losing muscle mass. We took him to the vet today and they did a bunch of tests. So...we'll see.

This week was jam packed....

CATEGORY: | Friday, January 26, 2007

Went to Ballet, went to library, went to doctor to get vacinations that WERE REQUIRED!! Did usual errands groceries, walk dog daily, lots of cleaning, oh and then there was the part where Memphis got sick from the vacinations and threw up a whole bunch and it was super scary. She has never had that reaction. Tried to sew...have deadlines...too much care giving not enough creative time. Oh and then there was the lack of sleep due to her illness. Kept waking up every 20 minutes the 2nd night and the first night I just had to get up at 5am and stay up after going to bed at 12:30 one of my few productive sewing nights. Oh and there was the big girl booster seat, thank goodness it was put to use after the old one was thrown up on. Oh and then there is our Russian Blue cat, Church(we adopted him when he was 7 months old and had no idea he was a pure breed) He is now 17 and taking a turn for the worst. It's hard to watch. Soooo skinny and hungry all the time. He is a diabetic too. The last vet we saw had him on insulin that almost killed him. Now he is off insulin after being on it for 5 years. We had to give him two shots a day for 5 years. Go to the dump to dispose of the the used needles for 5 years. Buy the small needles for him and have the people on the other side of the counter look at me funny for 5 years. Not to mention almost kill my cat. It seems he started producing insulin again and the shots were putting him into seizures, which we had to then force sugar water down his throat to make them go away. We LOVE our cat and I fear this is the end but I can't watch him like this much longer. He does not have a full life anymore and I feel so awful for him. I even bought him a new bed...but he won't use it. I feel very, very stressed. My hubby is taking him to the vet tomorrow and I fear he will not be coming back or they will tell us he needs to be on insulin again. He is so tough and strong. Most cats would not have made it this far. I still think he is gorgeous and I try to pet him as much as possible but a lot of the time he just wants his own space. Anywho...happy weekending everyone :)!!!!! Oh and thanks Therese for featuring me on your blog, Sofies Central!!! It such a fabulous blog and as you can see by my blog title you are one of my people!!! xoxo Oh the monster above, Harry, is from Cotton Monster made by the very talented Jennifer Strunge!!! I bought it for my collection but ended up giving it to my cutie!! She just loves him. I do his voice, as I do almost all her other pets. Sometimes it's hard to remember which voice goes to which pet. I also have to do the voices in public a lot. Sometimes I just say'Can't do it...too many people.'

P Town...Fun was had by all!!!

CATEGORY: | Tuesday, January 23, 2007

We went to visit our friends Kim and Robby this weekend. We got to see their new house and it is really gorgeous. They have a lot of work to do but it's soooo cool. They took us all around the city and we went to some new spots. I got to go to Fabric Depot which was amazing. I couldn't believe how big it was. From the outside it doesn't look like much but when you walk in...it's huge. I felt like I was in the 70's....but there was so much inside I had to keep my focus. Fleece...wool...eyes....fleece...wool...eyes. The cottons were calling me but I kept on task. I ended up getting some cool eyes and some gorgeous fleece. I passed on the wool but next time I won't be able to. I also go to go to Bolt on Alberta street. They had lots of cool new cotton prints but my favorite by far was the Japanese cottons. I thought Alberta street was kinda weird but the shops were cool. My husband really wants us to move there and as much as I like P Town I am not so sure. I only have a few friends there and I just don't have the feel for the town still.
If anyone has any cool Portland stories or info please send it my way....I need all the help I can get. xoxo

More Stills from our Home....and a few new plushies!

CATEGORY: | Friday, January 19, 2007
I heart bunnies...especially white ones so this is my collection so far
A bunny I did for a special order
Our family member Seana
Part of the same special order

One of the 3 Kiwi Birds we own from Spiked with pearls

I wanted to thank all of you that said wonderful things about my 6 things about me post. I really appreciate all the love and it made my day. Thanks Ashley G, Jhoanna, Meg, Zoe, Cynic the Lamb and Jessica.
I had a lot of fun reading all the weird things about all of you and I really truly appreciate the love you showed me. I feel very lucky to have this blog. It means a lot to me to be inspired and just to chat. I heart blogging and all of you. For those of you who read blogs but never comment that's cool too but you should seriously consider delurking yourself sometime. It feels great. I am taking a short blogging break. Back on Sunday. Happy weekending!!!:) Cheers to all of us weirdos!!!

Oh and a special thanks to Saidie... for featuring me on her blog and the compliments. xo

6 things about me.....

CATEGORY: | Thursday, January 18, 2007
One of my photos...I am obsessed with dolls (its in a frame so hard to
photograph well)

Our bedroom..yep another of my photos
Our bathroom wall with my bunny creation
Some of my plush collection...Ginger baby from perfectchildren
Zombie Doll from Schmancy
Itty Bitty Kitty by sereneonion
Boris by pureEva
Flapper doll by whileshenaps
Prototype for dolls I will make sooooon.

6 Things about me...tagged by Shula from www.Poppalina.typepad.com
I am tagging Jessica, Ashley G., Meg, Jhoanna ,Cynic the Lamb and Zoe

I like to stay up late and that's when I am the most creative but I am a mother now so I have been trying to convert myself to an early riser. Something I have never been and it is soooo hard I can't believe how hard it is. My goal is to get up at 7am do my areobics with Cher and go about my day.
It's working because I am taking babysteps. I predict by March I will be a regualr early riser....but my true self will long for the late nights or I will be super tired all the time.

I feel that I am an empath...I take on other people's emotions and it is really hard for me to handle the negative energy I sometimes receive from others. It can be very difficult for me sometimes to determine if this negative energy is actually for me or if it has nothing at all to do with me. The negative energy confuses me and is also very difficult to understand. Sometimes people are very unhappy about their life or just about something that happened that day and sometimes people are just very sarcastic. When I saw 'Witches of Eastwick' I thought I was a witch and it made me so happy to finally understand why I was such a freak and didn't fit in. Weird I know but I'm serious. So as you might imagine parties are really hard for me. Sometimes they go smoothly and I actually have fun but even when I do I am exhausted from it all. I can really only handle one big party every once in awhile. Unless of course I know most of the people.

I am somewhat of a ditz. This often comes across as me not being very smart. So I have an awful habit of being defensive when I shouldn't be. I am actually a smart person but I don't always express myself correctly at the moment. I often let on that I know more than I actually do but in the end if I feel I am lost I admit it. I would rather look stupid and learn than miss the opportunity for knowledge. I guess I am a better writer than I am a speaker. I hate to be thought of as dingy but there are worse things than looking dumb. It hurts my feelings sometimes though and I get down on myself for it.

I absoulutely love photography and wish with all my heart and soul that someday I will have a job doing something with photography. When I take photos I escape into a part of me where nothing else exists in the world. I get lost in the moment and am completely absorbed in it. It is so enormously satisfying when a shoot goes right and what you imagined in your mind ends up in print. It actually blows me away ever time it happens. The finished photographs actually stun me. I become in complete disbelief that I actually took them. But....I hate to have to take photos because I know how. I don't like to be put on the spot at all and have to be prepared to photograph things involving people...like weddings, parties etc. Sometimes I leave my camera at home because the whole thing stresses me out.....

I am OCD. I always have lists running thru my head about way too many things. I live in a small space so I am always going thru each nook in cranny in my head trying to think of things to get rid of so I can be 'Minimal Dawn'. I love my 'stuff' but sometimes I wish I could just get rid of 80% of it and just have that much less to obsess about. When I leave the house I always have to go back in at least once to see if I left the back door unlocked or the burners on or a candle lit or something plugged in that should not be. It drives my family crazy but I have always been like this as long as I can remember.

I repressed a very large set of memories for 14 years which I think is very weird!
I was molested by my grandfather when I was 6 years old and did not realize it until I was almost 21. I spent a year living in NJ with one of my Aunts and Uncles and we were at their house on the shore with a whole lot of extended family. One night my Aunt Pam and I were sitting on a bench on the beach and she asked me if anything weird ever happened with me and my Grampa. She told me that he had molested both of her daughters and he was no longer welcome at their home and all of a sudden it was like a huge surge of water was released and all these memories flooded into my mind about what he had done to me. Awful details that involved all my senses and I felt a huge sense of relief and very sick at the same exact time. You see when you repress things they are actually still there in your mind but they take on their own forms. So all those years I thought I was a sick person for having the thoughts that I had. I had no idea that it was not my fault and that it was do to the trauma of what happened to me. That summer, I think it was the next day, my Grampa who was also at the shore house ( it was a 3 story house just gorgeous) had a stroke. I was never able to confront him. He was the only Grampa I ever had because my folks got divorced when I was 6 and our birth father did not continue to have a relationship with my brother or myself so I never got to know my other Grandparents.
I have never said all of this to perfect strangers and I have to say it feels incredible. I think I am working on being the best me I can be. Saying things out loud or writing them down makes them real and I am so glad that I had the chance to do it.

Shula's post was super eerie for me because I...go to bed late, acquire accents easily, see outlines of people that aren't there, have a tendency when alone to live completely in my own head and lose track of time, am an empath and am horrible with names. I didn't want to copy her so I picked a few other things as well.

Thanks Shula xo

Just look at all that Plush....

CATEGORY: | Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Just check out those tootise roll curls. I was a pro with the curling iron. I actually still have some of these plush and have pashed them to my daughter. Looking at this photo brings back a lot of memories. I really love collecting things and I guess I always have. It always made me feel better and still does. I have always felt like I don't fit in but as I have gotten older I don't mind.
There are a lot of us out there that feel that way and I now know I am not alone. Not fitting in is who I am and that's just fine with me.

It's Lisa from Bird in the Hand's birthday today. She really inspires me! She makes me feel like I can do anything and that even if it is difficult it will be well worth it in the end. I came across her blog one day and I feel very lucky I did. Happy Birthday Lisa!!! You truly are one of a kind and we are all very lucky to have you!!

Here are some things that have made me smile this week..
This drawing
This person
These boots
This blog I found and this one
This photo
and this photo
and this photo
and this photo and this photo
this person her work and her blog
and of course this person, her blog and her work.

What an arm my kid has....

CATEGORY: | Tuesday, January 16, 2007
First there was the snowball

Sledding for the first time like a big kid
Snow walk with the Gucc

Of course there were snow angels....

Woke up at 6:30, made beds, did breakfast, did areobics with Cher, bathed daughter, showered,
went on long snow walk with dog and child(Gucc actually loves the snow), did snow angels first of course, came back for snow saucer, went sledding for approx 1 and 1/2 hours. Got to go down hill once. Walked back home pulling very tired daughter on snow saucer, had lunch and have been doing chores. All in all a super productive and very fun day and it's only 2:30. I heart the snow...but I don't like driving in it. Happy Snow Day!!

I wish there were two of me...

CATEGORY: | Monday, January 15, 2007

This weekend was great. We went on a fam snow walk, cleaned house, I did some sewing, listed some items in my shop, blogged, did areobics, went to our friends store opening 'Sugartown', sold some books, bought some books (at Half Priced Books of course), took down our gorg new pencil X-mas tree, rested, dropped off some stuff to Value Village and did some coloring with Memphis.
It is still super cold here and the snow is still around a little. I am working on some of my resolutions. Been getting up earlier but having trouble falling asleep. I think I need a new pillow. Does anybody have an suggestions. I hate pillow shopping. Well...off to do areobics with Cher Happy Monday. xo

Sugartown 2421 Market Street Seattle, Wa

CATEGORY: | Sunday, January 14, 2007

Our super fab friends Amy and Kerri just opened their new shop....Drum roll....'Sugartown.
It's in Ballard across from Archie Mcphee's. We went to the offical opening and Memphis was a hit. She wore her cutie bear hat and awesome vintage jacket both given to her by Amy & Kerri. Memphis had Ginger Ale for the very first time and loved it and I had wine spritzer. Yum, Yum but man dangerous...went straight to my head. Jason of course had Pabst.
Their shop is soooooooo amazing you just gotta check it out. So if you live in Seattle head down to 'Sugartown'. You won't be sorry. Plus Amy and Kerri are two of the nicest people on the planet.
Oh and I just had to get these really cool earrings that I will post later.
Hope everyone had a super duper weekend...we did. xo

Back to the Plush.....

CATEGORY: | Friday, January 12, 2007
Pam the Owl Love=Creature in my shop
This is Sasha in my shop Fabric given to me by Lisa A Bird in the Hand
Gift for a friend...
Wolfram the Robin Love=Creature in my shop
Leidseplein the Bunny Rabbit Love Creature in my shop

Finally....I have posted some new Love=Creatures in my Etsy shop and have begun work on a new Supermaggie Order. So I am BUSY!!! Some of these I have had finished or half finished for awhile but just didn't post them in my shop. Takes time to come up with all those names and descriptions...but it's fun. So...here they are hope you like them.
I feel like I have dropped of the face of the earth this week. Have been home now for 2 days without driving anywhere. We take our dog walks but that's been about it. Too much ice and really what's the point of risking it? So tomorrow I will get out and see the world or at least target. I have been reading sooooo many blogs lately and have found Shiney Squirrel, Ann Wood, Curious Bird, Bloesem and Oh Joy! So now I will be reading about 2o or 30 a day....phew. I don't read them all everyday. I need to update my links section badly but it is complicated and Jason has to help me. So it will happen in due time. Not much progress on the becoming a Buddhist but still on my mind. I will also post some swaps I have done very soon and some of more of my plush colletion.
Happy Weekending. xoxo