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Posted by Admin Eson on Sunday, September 16, 2007 in
Now we pray...for hope

I dreamt I was a Rockstar
The night grows long
Self portrait...'Shattered'
My first time taking night photos and it was so much fun. I love it.
I used to love printing on cool textured papers

The Day the rats attacked
Being part of the it scene

The years I spent in photo school were some of the best times of my life. At the time I had been managing a small retail shop and was totally burnt out. I needed something that was just for me that I could call my own. So we forked over the BIG bucks to put me in school part time. It was super hard working all day and dragging myself to school after work but I always knew how lucky I was to be able to go. At the time I was very, very depressed and photo school gave my life such meaning and purpose. It was a defining moment for me...one that I will always look back on and be very, very grateful for. I miss the photo shoots the most. Planning them, shopping for them, getting one of my friends or patient hubby to dress up and pose for them. Oh it was magical!! I not only learned how to print in black-n-white and color (color was my favorite...I feel deeply in love) but I also learned about light, exposure, composition and how to be critiqued by my peers. Something I had never experienced before. It was very satisfying to find out just how creative I was and how strong my visual skills really were. I had a lot of natural talent that I had no idea I had. I didn't however have nearly as much confidence in my skills and there were many times this caused me great amounts of stress. I will never forget being in studio lighting class....it was like I found Nirvana...it was blissful...amazing...an entire world opened up to me. I learned that I could actually create my own reality to an extreme. Tell a story straight from my own thoughts. I LOVED it. I learned that I have a dark side...one that is related to some things that happened to me as a young child. I learned that this never fully allowed me to grow up and I would forever be drawn to childhood images...old toys...bright colors...extreme emotions...and the need to be loved and helped. My portfolio class was super duper heavy. Each week we had to dissect each and every image...diving deeply into the meanings. It was very emotional and it taught me so very much about myself. I had a few really amazing teachers that also really helped to build up my confidence. Of course there were the students that had the BEST equipment, knew all the technical terms and could talk a blue streak using all the fancy photo jargon...it wore on me at times. I am not one of those people and it's hard to be around them but I kept telling myself the proof was in the photo and many times their photos were bland and emotionless even if they were perfectly printed and lit. Anywho today I was thinking a lot about the good 'ole film days and decided to share a few of my photos from then. I have A LOT more photos...a lot more and plan on sharing more often.
Thank you Photo school...you were good to me. xo
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